Loving relationships are one of the main breeding grounds for liars simply because when there is commitment involved, certain expectations are inevitably established. And if these expectations are not met, the lie begins to pay off. It starts with white lies. Lies that people think are safe and harmless because they make people feel good and calm.

Let’s say your wife asks if she looks fat during her third trimester of pregnancy. Even if she looks like a whale, a white lie would indicate otherwise, where you’d probably say “You look like you just put on a bit of weight, honey, nothing to worry about!”

People generally consider white lies to be harmless because they are polite and sensitive to a person’s feelings. These are minor lies and may not necessarily show physical or verbal traces.

On the other hand, well-developed lies are much more complex. Serious lies, like making up stories to cover up Boys’ Night Out last night, or denying a crucial accusation that you know can cause critical and life-changing consequences, are definitely detectable.

Think about your average poker game. If the stakes rise, players know this is the time to be deceitful, cunning, and deceitful. From scratching her butt to how often she swallows, her fellow players can figure out her every move.

It’s more like a liar’s game. If you can bluff your way to a full house, then it’s time to cash in the chips and call it a night.

So, so you know what cards are being played, here are some guides to detecting lies:

1. Too much eye movement

They say that the eyes are the windows to the soul, so it is not surprising to see poker players wearing sunglasses. A liar’s eyes will move a lot and shift quite often to avoid your gaze because the liar is afraid you’ll catch something of the expression in his eyes. Think of it as a defense mechanism known as ‘avoidance’. Eye contacts can create a connection and they will desperately try to make sure that doesn’t happen.

2. Staring too long

A pair of unfocused eyes is an elementary clue that a person is lying, but don’t be fooled if your partner is also using prolonged staring as a lying weapon. Since it’s common knowledge that less eye contact can give away a liar, generations and generations of liars in this world have figured out a way to counter this by doing the exact opposite.

If your partner is staring at you for longer than normal while telling you about their meeting out of town on the weekends, it can also be an indicator that they are lying. Veteran liars do this quite well. They have lied so much in their lives that they have found a way to control their eye movements.

3. Dilation of the pupil

Students are also indicators. No! These are not students like the elementary school students we are talking about. We refer to the pupil as that round, dark spot in the very center of the eyeballs that contracts in light and dilates when it’s dark. However, the pupils often dilate when a person lies profusely. This is because adrenaline is pumped harder in the body due to a response from the sympathetic nervous system.

And by the way, do you remember the words “Fight or Flight” in Human Biology? It is the sympathetic nervous system that is responsible for producing chemicals in our bodies to help equip us with strength when we are faced with a stressful situation, such as a confrontation. Whether we “fight” to tell the truth, or “flee” to make up a lie, our bodies display certain involuntary activities that are very difficult to control. That’s why your words may be saying “No” but your body is blatantly saying “Yes.”

4. blink

A good way to determine if your husband is lying to you is to see how much he blinks. Liars blink less frequently because they are trying to control their facial expressions. They want to blink less to look more closely into your eyes, to give you the impression that they want you to believe.

That’s the thing with lying. You are not only trying to tell a lie, but you are also trying to make sure that the person you are lying to believes it.

5. Looking down

Liars look down when they tell a story. This is because they are not scanning the part of your brain that remembers the information. You see, people who tell the truth tend to look up when they tell a story. This is normal sensory coordination when a person is truly remembering certain details or events, as if searching for the memory ‘up there’ in their head. A liar looks down because he’s not trying to remember, but composing and making up a credible story to sell.

6. poker face

Have you ever wondered what the blank poker face looks like? In addition to the eyes, the poker face controls the lower facial muscles. Obsessive grins, fake smiles, lip twitches, teeth gnashing, and jaw-dropping movements are surefire clues to amateur liars. Veteran liars know this all too well, so they instead control their mouths while lying to you, hence the poker face.

7. Use of objects

Liars will fight tooth and nail to protect their secrets, so they will unwittingly use objects to distract their interviewers during an interrogation. For example, they will bang on the table with a pen, play with their rings, pretend to look for things in their bags, or simply write on their BlackBerries while being questioned. This creates a communication barrier between the interviewer and the “suspect”, thus setting them free.

8. Changing your weights

FBI investigators monitor the behavior of criminals through their surveillance cameras. They know that the words spoken by a suspect are not always the basis of credibility and can be of virtually no value to them.

In a thorough investigation, the authorities rely closely on the bodily movements shown in the interrogation room. They review the tapes and keep an eye out for any leads. A shift in weight before a suspect answers a question gives him more seconds to think about what he is going to say.

So if your partner suddenly shifts sitting position, crosses their legs, scratches their buttocks, or gets up and sits in the chair, chances are they are subconsciously taking more time to think about a way out.

9. Parrot

While most lies involve nonverbal responses, there are also verbal cues that can help you spot a lie. After all, “less talk, less mistakes” – that’s what good liars know for sure. So, in an attempt to limit the conversation, a professional liar will not only skip over the small details of the story, but will also use their own words or sentences to deny any accusation.

For example, “Did you go to the club the night we argued?” The liar usually responds, “I didn’t go to the strip club the night we argued.”

10. Too polite

People who are too polite may also be up to no good. Just because they say what you want to hear doesn’t necessarily mean they’re telling the truth. Many law enforcement officers know this. That’s why there are car chases. When they see a suspicious-looking driver on the road, police officers can tell if he is trying to mask hidden real intentions through unusual use of overly polite words.

“Good morning, Officer. How may I help you?”, “I’ll be more than happy to put on my shirt and walk straight for you!”, “No, I’m afraid you’re wrong, Ole Dear Kind Sire, that bag of grass is for my son’s science project!”

Think of it this way, if your partner normally talks like Tupac on normal days and one day he suddenly comes home talking like a Pope, wouldn’t that seem disturbingly strange?

Knowing the signs of a lying partner can help you stay one step ahead. However, knowing if your partner is lying is just one step, it doesn’t end here yet. The next part you need to worry about is how to prove it, because just like Tom Cruise’s character in the movie ‘A Few Good Men’ said, “It doesn’t matter what I believe in, it’s what I can prove.” !”